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OUR MISSION
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OBVIOUS Magazine empowers and motivates the man and woman seeking self-gratification. Our mission is to lift up people and that the first fundamental of that mission is a belief in people. People have value.

Factual information is absolutely of the highest importance, even with the smallest things. Obvious offers unbiased expert opinions both professionally and personally. How-to relationship advice to understand the opposite sex's psyche to build a better relationship. Lifestyle and fashion will be an addition to our purpose and your desires.

Obvious Magazine is web-zine. Print version will be available in February 2010 during NYC Fashion Week and Fashion Week LA March 2010. Once in print, OBVIOUS will be a full-sized, flip-magazine book (female version on one side, male on the other) targeted to both sexes with national distribution.

Obvious Magazine. Because Life Isn't.

All Rights Reserved.

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If you would like to contact OBVIOUS Magazine for submissions, ideas, or comments, you can email us below. We are grateful to hear from you:

General Inquires:
[email protected]

Model and Photograpy Submissions:
Jerris Madison
Creative Director  Submissions

Writing Submissions:
J. Keri Ward
Editor-in-Chief  Submissions

Beauty/Grooming Submissions:
[email protected]

Fashion Buzz/News - Men:
[email protected]

Fashion Buzz/News - Women:
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Finance Advice
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Menswear Advice (Fashion, etc.)
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Womenswear Advice (Fashion, etc.)
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SPIRIT'S SOCIAL NETWORKS:

Saturday
16May2009

Deal or No Deal: What Men Really Think About Relationships

Men Side: The importance of open, honest and candid communication both personally & professionally. The opportunities created by being forward and proactive.

For most men, being real about their innermost feelings is something that just isn’t that easy to do. Almost from birth, men are flooded with “lessons” about what it means to be a man. They are taught to “suck it up,” that “real men don’t cry,” and that the “tougher” you are, surely that must equate to the depth of your masculinity.

With notions such as these so deeply rooted within the spirit of a man, it is no wonder that so many men have such a tremendous amount of difficulty in being vulnerable, open, and honest in the expression of their deepest emotions. However, those men who dare to defy the societal impositions of masculinity forced upon them often live lives full of personal and professional success beyond measure. The primary reason for this success is because it is in our moments of genuineness that we are able to connect with one another as human beings, regardless of the differences that typically seek to divide us.

In a man’s professional life, when he is genuine with himself and those around him, he is able to tap into the true desires of his heart and identify those things which are most important to him. He can ascertain his passions, be candid (with himself and others) about his current circumstances, and seek out whom and what it he needs to navigate himself into the arenas that he desires to travel within. Not only is he able to communicate what it is that he needs and wants, but he is typically respected and well-liked for being a person of good character and genuineness. The key to his success lies not within his ability to manipulate people or his situations, but it is in his being liked by those who know him. As a result, not only do people want to do things for him, but they keep him in mind for opportunities and advancement that he himself may not even be aware of. Bottom line – when people like you, they want to see you succeed.

In his personal life, when a man is able to communicate the private thoughts of his mind to the woman that he has given his heart to, that woman cannot help but love him truly, deeply, and passionately. While most men are able to rattle off “poor communication” as among one of the primary reasons that most relationships don’t last, it is but a small number of men who are able to recognize how much they often contribute to such ill interaction between themselves and their mate. Although it may be true that women, by nature, are more verbal than men and often out speak them, it is equally true that women desire to have their men communicate honestly and openly about everything that affects them. While this can often be a challenge for men, learning how to break the glass ceiling of communication can help men who are frustrated, disappointed, unhappy, or just simply feeling like their lives could be richer than it currently is.

The easiest way to move yourself from a man who is closed, unable or unwilling to communicate is to begin simply by making the decision that you want to begin to communicate more openly, honestly and genuinely about your thoughts and feelings. By making this decision, you can then set out to take advantage of the opportunities to do so as they present themselves. In the beginning, it will be important to start “small.” That means that you may not start by telling people your greatest fears or biggest secrets, but it may be about taking a deep breath and pausing to think before you speak the next time someone asks, “So what do you think?” or “How do you feel about that?” And after that deep breath, and pause for reflection, you actually take the risk of communicating honestly and openly about your thoughts and feelings. Perhaps when you realize that the world doesn’t fall off of its axis, you’ll be able to do it again, and again, and again.

Until next time...

S.

Friday
15May2009

Your Reality in...CHECK.

Somewhere in the United States, a woman is assaulted every nine seconds. It is estimated that (at least) one in three women will be beaten, coerced or abused at some point during her lifetime. Abuse doesn't have to happen all the time. It can happen occasionally or even only once. Educating yourself about Domestic Violence (also known as Intimate Partner Violence, or IPV) will empower you with the tools you need to protect and empower yourself and those you care about.

First and foremost, be aware that Domestic Violence is an equal opportunity abuser. Young or old. Rich or poor. Anyone can be abused. Secondly, know that Domestic Violence comes in a various forms. Knowing what they are can help you spot someone in trouble. Common forms of abuse include:

Physical Abuse

Being pushed, shoved, slapped, pinned down, kicked, and/or having objects used as weapons against you are all forms of physical abuse.

Social Abuse

Forced isolation from friends and family or being unable to participate in certain activities are all examples of social abuse. A person may give in to this form of abuse in order to avoid an argument or because they fear that fighting it may lead to other forms of abuse.

Financial Abuse

This may include not being provided enough money, being forced to give your money to your partner, or only being allowed to make purchases approved by your partner.

Sexual Abuse

Being forced, pressured or threatened to engage in any form of sexual activity against your will.

Spiritual Abuse

Having your spiritual beliefs used to manipulate your thoughts, feelings and/or behaviors, being prevented from practicing your religious or spiritual beliefs, or being ridiculed for your religious or spiritual beliefs.

Psychological and/or Emotional Abuse

This form of abuse includes being put down, purposely neglected as a form of punishment, and emotional blackmail.

Perhaps the most common, and often times overlooked form of Domestic Violence is Verbal Abuse. This form of abuse can include your being called names, threatened (either directly or indirectly), criticized, blamed for the victimizer’s abusive behavior, or being the target of their violent or abusive anger.

What often makes verbal abuse such an insidious form of Domestic Violence is many abusers do not recognize that they have a problem. After the abuse, they are likely to act as if nothing happened, and may even seem to be in a better mood after the abuse has occurred. This often occurs for a variety of reasons. Perhaps they feel as if they have “won” and gotten you to back down, feel badly about yourself, or forced you to give in to what it is that they are wanting.

Even worse, verbal abusers often attempt to project a “perfect image” to the world, opting to exhibit most of their abusive behavior behind closed doors. This may make the victim feel isolated and alone, feeling that no one will believe them or making them second guess whether or not they may be overreacting about what is happening to them.

Making the decision to free yourself from an abusive relationship is just as difficult, if not more difficult, than healing from it. In many ways, the scars that are left by these relationships cut far deeper than the visible wounds that may be left behind, but going on to live a happy, healthy, loving life is possible. With the right amount of help, support, and time, it is even possible to love and trust yourself and a new partner in a new relationship.

If you believe that you, or someone you know may be in trouble, don't ignore it. If there is someone that you're concerned about, let them know that you care and that you are concerned (and if applicable, their children's) well-being. Resources for assistance include: the National Domestic Violence Hotline: (800) 799-SAFE (7233) and the National Center for Victims of Crime (800) 394-2255.

Until next time...

S.